Human beings are, by nature, social creatures; we crave connections and meaningful bonds with others. A healthy relationship is an essential part of an individual’s well-being.

Social wellness means fostering ourselves and nurturing our relationship with others. It involves building healthy and supportive relationships. It’s about making a genuine connection – giving and receiving social support.

No Man Is An Island

Research suggests that people who are alone and isolated are more prone to chronic diseases. A positive social network can encourage and support an individual to be the best person she can be. It makes her emotionally resilient and improves her self-confidence.

A positive social life and strong social networks also have health benefits, such as:

• Helps you live a longer life

• Lessens the risk of cardiovascular diseases and reduces blood pressure

• Boosts the immune system to fight off infectious diseases

• Increases happiness and reduces stress and anxiety

The fact that some people are better social communicators has led others to think that they don’t have a chance to improve their skills. This is a misconception because, like many other skills, social ability can be learned and improved upon. Below are some tips for how to develop your social skills to help you begin your journey on the path to social wellness.

1. Use Your Ears First, Not Your Mouth

Listen. Many of us think that communication is all about talking. We interrupt, advise and criticize someone without reflecting upon what he/she said. In this age where fast communication is widespread, it seems that the ability to listen is now becoming unusual, as everyone seems to be in such a hurry to speak what’s on their mind. People are more concerned with what they are going to say next than keeping their ears open. Good communication requires good listening as well as talking.

To be a good listener, we must, first, pay attention. Be interested in that person and ask open-ended questions. Stop blabbering and start listening. After all, people prefer good listeners to good talkers.

Use silence. People are often afraid of this. Many of us become uncomfortable and self-conscious when there’s silence at the table. We always believe that silence kills the conversation. But there’s a difference between being silent all the time and knowing when to be silent. Silence allows the speaker to reflect on his own feelings, and to progress at his own pace.

2. It’s Not About You, It’s About Them

To be interesting, be interested in the other person. Human beings are naturally vain in nature; we rather like to experience a feeling of importance. People may not be as interested in you as you may like to think. If we simply try to impress people, we will never have many true friends.

Focus on the other person and encourage them to talk about themselves. Make them feel good by giving them attention, remembering their name and being genuinely interested in them. Transfer the focus from yourself to the other person and you won’t feel like you’re under pressure of “putting on a show”. By doing this, you make yourself more comfortable in opening your thoughts and ideas to someone.

3. Spread Happiness

Happiness is contagious. Everybody in the world is in search of happiness and there is one certain way to get it, and that is by controlling your thoughts. Happiness doesn’t come from external forces; it comes from internal conditions. Instead of focusing on the negative, divert your attention to the positive outcomes of a problem.

Researchers followed more than 4,700 people over 20 years and found that people who are happy can spread their happiness to someone. People respond more to speakers that spread happiness, and a smile can make you more likable and charming. This is how people come to you instead of you going to them.

The thoughts you keep in your mind control how you feel. It isn’t about what you have or where you are now; it’s your approach to it.

4. Be Kind

Be the kind of person you want to meet. Behaviour is a vital part in our relationships with others. Our character determines our actions and interactions, and how we treat other people. Human beings unconsciously value the rule of reciprocity. When you treat someone well, s/he will feel like treating you the same way. Our community thrives by showing support and empathy to other people. Being unselfish and thoughtful will gain us strong connections that build upon trust.

“The difference between appreciation and flattery? That is simple. One is sincere and the other insincere. One comes from the heart out – the other from the teeth out. One is unselfish – the other selfish. One is universally admired – the other universally condemned.”—Dale Carneige

Be genuine and give honest appreciation. Show respect to others’ opinions and try to see things from other people’s points of view.

5. Art Of Persuasion

The best communicator knows how to use body language and words to converse. In fact, body language is over 90 percent of what you are communicating. Your thoughts and feelings reflect through your body language, such as your mannerisms, hand gestures, eyes, and posture.

Use the power of language to convince someone. Avoid lazy words, such as “very”. Instead of saying “very smart”, say “brilliant” or substitute “very pretty” with “beautiful”. Body language, such as eye contact, makes you appear more interested, and paying attention to someone makes you more earnest and likeable.

Let’s Celebrate

Forget your shyness and enjoy social wellness month by saying hi and smiling at a stranger. Let’s start nurturing our relationships by joining a volunteer group, art club, or calling an old friend that you have lost touch with. Start making new friends while still preserving the old ones.