Dear Fear, I Hear You But I Won’t Allow You To Take Control Today
Contributed by Manale Ganiere May 18, 2016
I was challenged to write a post every two weeks … one month ago. I am usually very keen to take on challenges, but this one put me in a state of panic, which I did not know I could be in, and I have challenged myself many times this past decade!
I have tried to write in French, thinking that the language may be the reason why I cannot write … nope, still panicking. I have tried to write about things that I like or that I am interested in. I have tried to write about work, about expat life, about being a new parent, a role model, about values, traditions … blank, blank, blank.
When I was desperately looking for answers, advice, solutions … anything that could help me to write, I was told: “The first step is the most difficult one, but once you start you will not be able to stop. Don’t try to be perfect; be prolific and you will improve with time.” At the time, I thought, “Yes, well, thanks, that sounds good, but how do I take the first step when my brain freezes each time I lift up my foot?”
I followed the advice anyway and kept trying and trying, believing that the freezing would go away with the power of trying. It did not. So I eventually gave up, although my little inner-voice kept telling me, “You are going to write a post; you committed yourself to this challenge, you have to do it” Shhhhh! I don’t want to hear you anymore! Leave me alone in my little comfy zone.
Today, I could not possibly keep the voice quiet when I stumbled on this quote by Jim Rohn:
“If you really want to do something you’ll find a way. If you don’t you’ll find an excuse.”
Ha! I really could not avoid this one. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and began to meditate. I did not feel relaxed at all; I still felt panicked. So I told myself, enough is enough: GET THIS POST DONE! So I politely but firmly acknowledged my fear: “Dear Fear, I know you are there and I can hear you loud and clear. I have something to tell you though, so listen carefully. Instead of trying to push you away, I am welcoming you with open arms. Today is the day I acknowledge you, just the way you are. No more, no less. So please, take the passenger seat (yeah, yeah, you heard me well: the passenger seat), make yourself comfortable and enjoy this ride; my ride and the many more to come!”
Stepping out of your comfort zone will always be frightening, which is totally fine because we are human and not perfect. When that happens, I want you to remember that the best way to overcome this fear is to welcome her (mine is a “she”), embrace her, and be clear with her that she is welcome to ride with you, but as your guest in the passenger seat next to you. The only person allowed to drive your beautiful car is you, because you are the one true owner of your journey.
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