As a coach, speaker and business person, my life revolves around people. The ability to truly connect with the people I sit with is vitally important for me. And when I first got started, I – being meticulous and careful – would sit down and plan everything out. After all, if you fail to plan, you plan to fail, right?

I would go through a checklist of things to say, areas to cover, etc., before going for the meeting.

The same applied for workshops that I taught. But what I quickly found out was that things rarely if ever followed the plan I had created. People came in different mental states and moods, with different issues that I didn’t know about before or even different agendas.

Within 5 minutes, I found that my wonderfully created plan was wonderfully irrelevant. And immediately, I realized – if I was going to have any success connecting with the person seated opposite me, or the crowd right in front of me – I would have to get out of my head and use my eyes, ears and heart to truly understand them.

The thing is when I did that, I could really see, hear and feel what they truly needed. It was ALL THERE – apparent as can be. And once I knew what they truly wanted and needed, I could help them. But if I had stuck with my plan and refused to budge, I would have run straight into a stonewall over and over again.

I’ve learnt this lesson over and over again, with different groups all over the world. And while I still do my research and my homework, I go into every meeting with an open heart, a clear mind and ready-to-use ears. I don’t follow a strict, rigid plan – instead, I let their needs guide the course of the conversation, facilitation and coaching.

This has worked miracles for me.

The clients I work with and the people I do business with tell me how connected they feel when talking to me. It’s like I am right there beside them, every step of the way. I get (and I mean TRULY GET) what they are trying to say – the words and the emotion behind their stories. They even think I have a special gift.


While I don't deny it (it's always lovely to hear people think that about me), I know the secret is because I am truly there with them, in heart, mind and spirit. And when you are truly there with someone, all is obvious.

You just need to see, hear and feel.

I urge you to do this with the people that matter in your life. Put your phones down, sit up straight and clear your mind before your meetings. Truly commit to being fully present with the people you meet with. Open up your heart, mind, ears and eyes so you can pick up on every detail, knowing you are enough.

If you do this, you will form bonds and connections with people in ways you cannot imagine.

Try it. It's worked for me - and I know it will work for you too.

Live Fearlessly,

Yana

Visit Yana Fry Coaching page to find out more about Yana's work.