Words are powerful. They can both wound and show love deeply. A single word can change the entire meaning of the sentence. As we begin 2017, may we use words responsibly and thoughtfully to spread positivity.

Here are five tips:

1. Replace Negative Words With Positive Ones

When I am giving feedback to my students, I never use the word weakness. Instead, I use the term area of improvement. The former is defeating and discouraging, while the latter implies that with effort and time, progress can be made.

Similarly, a word like bad could be replaced with phrases like “I would prefer it if you…” and instead of saying what you don’t want, perhaps replacing it with a statement indicating what you do want could be more effective in communicating your messages.

2. Always Give Credit When It’s Due

Many times, it is easier to point out a fault or a flaw rather than to see the good in something or someone. Yet, noticing when someone does something well and pointing it out goes a long way: It leaves both the giver and the receiver in a better state of mind. Some phrases to start with:

“I thought it was excellent the way you…”

“I am impressed by…”

“I appreciate that...”

Yet Carol Dweck, a psychology professor at Stanford University and author of the acclaimed book Mindset: The New Psychology Of Success cautions us about praising too much and not pointing out where real learning could take place. This is an important reminder so as not to get too carried away with our praises.

3. Use The Right Tone

The right tone is as important, if not more important, than using the right words. Our tone conveys our emotions, attitudes, and intentions. If our tone is brusque or disinterested, it doesn’t really matter what words come out from our mouth. Let us always be mindful to use encouraging, gentle, and caring tones when we are speaking or writing to others.

4. Speak Or Write With Empathy

To build rapport and connection with others, it could be helpful to use words that convey a sense of empathy Phrases like “I understand where you are coming from….”, or “I know how you feel” gives the other person assurance that he or she is not alone, and builds trust between two people with similar experiences.

However, it is important that this sense of empathy is genuine and that we do not pretend or assume we understand how someone might feel. If we don’t, it might be better to just offer a listening ear or a supportive presence.

5. Achieve Understanding Through Paraphrasing

In our conversations and face-to-face interactions with others, we may encounter misunderstandings and miscommunication. Paraphrasing someone else’s words can help us achieve clarity because it shows the speaker our level of understanding. If we fall short, the speaker will be able to clarify immediately.

For example, you could say “You mentioned that…” or “I heard you say…”

Paraphrasing someone’s words is also an indication that you are listening and that you care about what the person has to say.

Happy New Year and may this year bring you words filled with positivity!

After all, words are something we will never be able to truly take back.