Why Do You Really Resist Getting Help?

Do you resist getting help because you want to do it on your own? Or is it because you do not really want to succeed?


I think one of the biggest downfalls many spiritual people have is thinking they can achieve results all by themselves.

Spiritual people tend to resist the help that is available to assist them in achieving success (or they become so needy they need to be helped all the time, but this is another topic for another day!). I know all about this resistance, because I used to be this way – not knowing that I was being spiritually arrogant!

I used to think, why should I pay someone to help me when I could do it all by myself? I knew myself better!

Then one day, I heard, on a free teleconference call, one of my mentors saying, “Will you climb Mt. Everest all by yourself? Or would you need a guide to show you the way?”

I thought about it and realized that of course, this makes so much sense!

Of course, I needed a guide. How could I climb the mountain if I had never been there?

So ever since then I have been on several programs with various mentors, learning the ropes, and now I think:

Gosh, why didn’t I join these programs much sooner! Because I am now enjoying all the benefits and abundance in my life, which I would only have been able to achieve in another 10 years if I stubbornly refused help.

What was I really resisting?

I think I resisted, first because of the commitment I had to make.

I thought, oh what if I paid so much money and then I didn’t do the work, or what if the program didn’t work for me? I know this sounds really silly now. Because the answer was simple. All I needed to do was to COMMIT TO DO THE WORK!

And I did.

I can’t tell you how much I have benefited from working with my mentors especially in the area of marketing and business.

Another reason I think I resisted getting help was because I thought that since I was a spiritual teacher, channel, and healer, and I was doing God’s work, then God and my spirit guides would send people my way!

I can’t believe I actually thought this way, what an airy-fairy way of thinking! The reality was that I could pray all I wanted, but if I didn’t get into action and do what I needed to on the earthly plane, then how on earth could I serve?

Another reason I resisted help was because deep down I didn’t think I deserve to succeed.

I felt I just needed to be satisfied with what I had, and that it was not spiritual to want more. Then one day I realized that I was being completely selfish by not being more out there to serve others. This realization also changed the way I see my service work and the whole definition of success for me.

This may sound so cliche, but really, “no man is an island”.

No one can succeed in anything by themselves. Even the great spiritual masters and financial gurus needed help.

It really does take a village to groom a person for any kind of success.

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This post was first published on Modern Medicine Woman and has been reposted on Connected Women  with the permission of the author. 

Edited by Michelle Sarthou
Image credit: Shutterstock


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Shamala Tan

Shamala is a life coach and author. What she does best is helping individuals to clarify and manifest their life's purpose so that they may live a life of fulfilment and meaning. She also assists HR departments to cultivate a sense of purpose with their staff in the work environment. Her key areas of strength include time management, human whispering, and mental/emotional wellness. One of her success stories as an author is to be featured alongside New York’s bestsellers Sonia Choquette, Robert Allen, Arielle Ford, Marci Shimoff as well as Christine Kloser in the book, Pebbles In The Pond.

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